Our family has had the opportunity to vacation together every year.  As I type, I am looking at pictures from November of 2012.  Blond hair, blue eyes, toothless grins.  I know every mother is bias, but our kids were so darn cute!  

What I am glad I didn't miss was the opportunity to simply be with them.  I think of backyard smores, puppy in the basket bike rides, watching them touch their toes in the ocean, and rounds and rounds of totally cheating mini golf!

​I wonder what you are glad you didn't miss with your family?  Be intentional, make memories.  You'll be glad you did.

I often live in yesterday or tomorrow land.  Regretting, wishing, planning, anticipating, rehashing.  While it is certainly not a bad thing to look back and reflect or to plan forward and anticipate, that is not where life is.  Life is here and now in this moment.  I wonder what is happening in your life right now?

​“There is no growth without change, no change without fear or loss and no loss without pain.”
— Rick Warren

The general phrase of, "I don't like change," has been uttered since Eden.  Today, I echo their words again.  It is not so much the that I don't like change, as it as that I don't like fear, loss or pain.  "What do I have to give up, who am I going to lose, how will I work with that person, what is expected of me, how will routines changes, what is their personality like, will we get along, how will I get it all done, I don't understand what they are asking of me, have they considered..." 

I wanted to write that I admire those who don't fear change, but I am not sure that statement is true on several levels.  Do they really not fear, or just put on a good front?  Do they really not fear because they are so self absorbed it doesn't matter to them?  Have they become so emotionally blunted that they no longer feel?  I am sure there are those that would argue with me, "I don't fear change,"  but I would have to disagree.  What changes I fear and what changes you fear may not be the same, but change does not come without some level of anxiousness.  I wonder what readjustment, changes, you are facing today? 

I know, it is a strong word full of foul connotations.  But to select a more gentle word would not be truthful.  After a conversation yesterday, I felt like an idiot.  I am not going to elaborate, no need to have you agree with my feelings....

What I did and do need to continually separate out is difference between what I feel and the truth of what is.  My feelings whisper things like, "Not good enough," "Missed that one, didn't ya," "Ha, told you you should have kept your mouth shut!" On and on this list could go.  You and I might even be able to have a contest as to who has the longer one.  But just because these are whispered to me by my emotions, does not make them truthful.  

The truth is I am fearfully and wonderfully made, loved by choice, stronger than I know, and more precious to Him that I will ever comprehend this side of eternity.  My friend's mantra has been, "Truth over lies."  Just because I feel like an idiot, doesn't mean that I am one.  No, the truth is far different and for that, I am very thankful.    

Mittens, AKA Black Widow, was in her usual morning spot, pawing at the window, just hoping to be noticed so someone would let her back in.  She prefers outside, except when it is too chilly for her liking.  Then, once the door is opened, it is either off to the food bowl or her favorite napping place.

But isn't that us also.  How many times are we on the outside, pawing, hoping someone will notice and let us in?  Let us into their group, their club, their conversation, their lives.  I think of the cruelness of junior high, letting someone in so that they may be the new humiliation target.  Of social media, being a part of the 1.2K followers...of people we falsely think make us a part of their inner group.  For those that lack the social skills to correctly read subtle cues and are thus left out or even shunned.  Those that want to be let in but for one reason or another are not.  

Obviously, I am not promoting joining just any group or allowing any and all to be a part of your close circle, Mom's advice still stands, "Choose your friends wisely for they will shape who you become."  But, I do encourage you today to be on the lookout for those that may be pawing at your window.  Lonely people who need a smile, a conversation, a simple acknowledgement that they even exist.    

Currently, I have two favorite thinking partners.  I have had several over the years, but for now, these two are who I need and assuming that I am who they need during this season of life.  As thinking partners, while I consider them friends, they are not to be my laugh it off with me friends, though sometimes we do just have to laugh at ourselves and each other.  No, my thinking partners challenge me, push me, hold me back, shove me forward, put up with my scowlly faces, let me cross my arms, and every so often even let me pout for a minute or two.  As partners, I hope they say I do the same for them. 

God has blessed us with the need and the gift of others.  Who are you pushing forward, holding back, helping them to see reality vs. raging momentary emotions?  Who is challenging you, offering different viewpoints, and pushing you?  May you be blessed with a thinking partner and be a partner who is thinking with others.

From my observation of people, we all have one.  I call mine, "Pandora's Box".  Original, I know, I know. You are really impressed.  But seriously, it is that box within us that hides what we don't want others to see.  We crack it open, maybe, with those we deeply trust.  All the while, hoping, praying, holding our breath as to their reaction.  Will they laugh, scoff, downplay, overshadow, or slam the lid back shut with the clear message never to open it their presence again?  Or will they listen, show compassion, empathize, simply listen?  If we open the box, will they even know what to do with us now?

I wonder this morning what is hiding in your box, who do you trust and who trusts you?  Our boxes are full of things like jealousy, pride, hurt, anger, fear and sadness.  Who can help you look into your box and who can you help open their box?  Trust and be trustworthy.  We need each other. 

There is a difference between holding a position of leadership and actually leading because you have the position to do so.  This is the end of my 27th year of teaching and being in a district that has a rather revolving door of both building and central office leadership, I have noticed a thing or two.

The difference between leaders and status quo keepers has huge implications for an organization.  I have worked under both.  Leaders have a vision and they push forward, keeping the leadership under them well informed and well trained.  They know their why and they work to figure out the how.  As Jim Collin's famous quote says, "Having the right people on the bus."  

But what happens when the right people are on the bus but the driver doesn't really have a plan for where they are going?  Frustration, anger, resentment, division begins to set in.  They thought they were part of a team or at the very least felt they were once a part of a team, but then...something happens.  The driver changes, loses focus, gets complacent or distracted, or the facade finally fades.  Good under leaders still have the enthusiasm to carry forth the work they had committed to, but slowly isolation sets in. While some may decide to get off at the next bus stop, others simply hunker down for the ride, hoping Siri begins to call out directions.  

Leadership is not easy.  It is complicated and risky.  But without a vision, it is pointless.  Everyone will end up somewhere, but they have no idea when they have arrived, if they are off course, close to the finish line, nothing.  Leaders must know their why and as a team work out the how.  

All 10 of us spread out down a long, wide hallway.  Normally we would be in kiddie chairs around a bunch of kiddie desks, but not today.    While the physical circumstances have changed a bit, the conversations didn't.  What is best for our students and how are we going to make it happen.

I am thankful that I am allowed to be a teacher.  But, as I have often wondered before, what about the rest of the world.  Teams of doctors and nurses, teams of police and fire, teams of employees and employers, teams of cooks and wait staff, teams of collectors and processors. Teams that work almost unnoticed and teams that are always on the forefront of the daily news.  Husband and wife teams, parent and child teams.  The list is endless.  

But what I have noticed about well functioning teams is that the individuals within them are willing to put in the extra effort necessary for the common goal(s) to be reached.  Willing to stay for an extra meeting, willing to have one more conversation, willing to consider another's idea, willing to challenge the call to keep the comfort.  Teams that put in the extra effort are the ones making the most impact on the world around them.  What role are you playing on your teams?

TED Talks--love them!  Was listening to ​Linda Cliatt-Wayman (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe2nlti47kA) and her slogan of "So What...Now What..." has stuck with me.  

So what, now what.  Hummm.  How many times do I make excuses, really ligament excuses, as to why this or that can't be changed, helped, turned around, etc.?  Rhetorical question, but if someone were secretly counting I am sure to be well into the tens of thousands.  Everything from little daily decisions, like my scale says I am a bit too chunky these days but...I am now over 50....I will eat better tomorrow...I look just like my mom...I am sure it is the medicine.... To much more influential decisions like as to why not all children in my classroom were prepared for the next step...cause there are just too many to help... I am doing the best that I can... if they would just come knowing....  Embarrassed, but fully admit that I have said all of these things...and more.

So what...they are coming to me with these needs...Now what am I going to do about it?  Thankfully education is moving from I to we.  I can not meet the needs of 20+ children effectively, but as a team we can.  Together we can fill learning gaps, together we can meet social/emotional needs, together we can be there for each other.  So what...now what.  Together, we can and will.